Do you remember when we lived in a world where computers and cell phones and social media didn’t exist?
I certainly do.
I might be one of the few people who wishes we could go back to those times. Back to when we actually had meaningful conversation. Remember when you had to be home to take a phone call? It allowed for so much space for a conversation to linger on, for all of the nuance and subtlety of actually getting to know one another instead of snapping to judgments based on quick flashes of pictures and status updates.
So, how do we bring back the art of conversation?
If you’ve been following along with the blog for the past few weeks, you may have noticed a progression from dating to considering courting to being in it for the long haul.
Being able to ask good questions and being willing to be vulnerable enough to answer good questions is especially crucial in today’s world of checking a screen every 6 minutes.
I don’t know about you, but I would much rather build a relationship on authentic conversation and connection than via some comments on social.
When you have decided to be “in” with someone for the long haul, the next goal is to establish a safe container for both individuals to grow and thrive in the relationship.
How do you do that?
Well, it starts with knowing what you want. And knowing what you’re comfortable with and what you’re not.
If you’ve made it this far, congratulations, you must be doing something that is working well for you.
In the next post, I’m going to give you a tool that will help you not only to ask great questions of your partner, but also to ask the same questions of yourself. These questions will be great for your own inner work, and they will be wonderful to share in inspired conversation. Knowing yourself and getting very comfortable with yourself is critical to the foundation of a good relationship.
Until then, I invite you to think about the following questions:
- What is your main belief about the way the world works? How does spirituality factor into how you view love and relationships?
- How important is it to you whether your partner has ever been married before? What about children? How the relationship is with his/her ex?
- Where would you live or not live?
- What kinds of hours would be ideal for working + quality time with one another and any other important family members?
This week the focus is all on you. Your desires, wishes, wants, likes, and dislikes. Once you’re clear with yourself, you can start to ask your partner questions and get the conversation going.
Share in the comments if you have any ahas or insights.